004: Proving That A Genetic Connection Doesn’t Affect Your Bond

Stacy is a single mother by choice who had a grueling eight-year journey to motherhood. She shares her struggles with infertility and the disappointments regarding the adoption and surrogacy processes. She researched every avenue available to her and suffered many miscarriages. In the end, the surrogacy process and adoption process paid off and she became the proud mother of two children. One through surrogacy and one through adoption.

Stacy explores her emotions during this time. She also discusses the stigmas as well as the hidden angels she found during her journey. There are pearls of wisdom in this episode for every mother and every woman wanting to be a mother.

Some highlights of today’s conversation:

• Stacy’s image of motherhood in the beginning.
• The string of miscarriages and hysterectomy that were a turning point.
• The avenues Stacy explored such as adoption and surrogacy.
• The failed attempts Stacy had to overcome.
• The day Stacy got the phone call about her two children –the 24 hours that ended her 8 year journey to motherhood with two kids.
• How not to give up on your desire to be a mother.
• The grieving process Stacy went through when letting go of the idea of biological children.
• The stigma regarding adopted children versus biological children.
• Stacy’s encouragement to future single-mothers-by-choice.
• What she likes about motherhood and what she doesn’t.
• Stacy’s parting advice to the audience.

Resources

Motherhood Reimagined Website

Motherhood Reimagined SMC Community

Motherhood Reimagined: When Becoming a Mother Doesn’t Go As Planned: A Memoir by Sarah Kowalski

Thank you for joining us for Motherhood Reimagined. You can contact us through the website or Twitter, Pinterest, Instagram, and Facebook.

Also, if you are wanting some guidance on this unconventional path, consider joining my Motherhood Reimagined SMC Community.

Inside my community, you get regular live guest expert interviews, community meetups, Ask Me Anything Calls, all my courses and of course connection to other single women at different stages of their SMC journey. 

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Quotes

"If you know in your heart of hearts that you want to be a parent, don't let grass grow, I feel like your heart goes first but your mind follows. If your heart knows you are meant to be there, your mind will get on board." -- Stacy

"Infertility is such a dark tunnel and it's really really easy to get sucked up into that dark tunnel." --Stacy

"I had been jilted by a surrogate, and I had been bailed out on by birth parents, and I had had many miscarriages, so you can understand why I didn't believe any of this was going to come to fruition. I thought I was going to have neither baby and I wound up with both." -- Stacy

"At some point I had the question pop up into my head, do you want to be a  biological mother or do you want to be a mother? And the answer to that was a resounding I want to be a mother, so I started pursuing adoption." -- Stacy