017: Brooke: Double Donor Twins and the Importance of Support

Brooke is the solo mom of twin boys. She started her journey at the age of 40 and underwent an emotional path to motherhood. Brooke used both a sperm and an egg donor for her pregnancy. She tells me about her hesitation to use an egg donor but how she conquered those fears and pushed forward in her process.

Brooke was a highly creative child who spent her 20s and 30s traveling and focusing on her career. However, a glance at a forgotten online dating profile triggered her need to go ahead and begin the single-mother-by-choice journey. Her first experience was not positive and led her to change clinics. She found a wonderful egg donor with her new clinic but the procedure was botched and Brooke had to cope with the disappointment. She explores that disappointment and reflects on how she moved forward.

Finally, Brooke had a successful IVF (In vitro fertilization) procedure and conceived her sons. She tells me about telling her family and the decision to move back home to be close to her family. That move home turned out to be for the best because Brooke developed preeclampsia at her 6-month mark and delivered her children at 32 weeks. She credits her family with helping her deal with her illness and the newborns. You can visit Brooke’s blog to learn more about her journey.

Some highlights of today’s conversation:

• Brooke’s early childhood and family ideals.
• How an EHarmony profile pushed Brooke to become a single-mom-by-choice.
• How Brooke found her sperm donor and the power of the voice.
• Brooke’s first IVF and her poor experience at the clinic.
• The perfect egg donor but the botched retrieval process.
• Why Brooke choose to go to Portland to conceive her boys.
• Moving home and premature birth.
• Brooke’s experience with bonding with her children.
• How books have helped Brooke open the door to the donor conception talk with her sons.
• How Brooke found her “community” and learned to ask for help.
• How Brooke juggles family and work.
• Why Brooke considers the single-mother-by-choice path a feasible one.

Resources

Brooke’s Blog

The Family Book by Todd Parr

Sign up to be a podcast guest

Motherhood Reimagined Website

Motherhood Reimagined SMC community

Motherhood Reimagined: When Becoming a Mother Doesn’t Go As Planned: A Memoir by Sarah Kowalski

Donor Sibling Registry

Sarah’s email

Thank you for joining us for Motherhood Reimagined. You can contact us through the website or Twitter, Pinterest, Instagram, and Facebook. 

Also, if you are wanting some guidance on this unconventional path, consider joining my Motherhood Reimagined SMC Community.

Inside my community, you get regular live guest expert interviews, community meetups, Ask Me Anything Calls, all my courses and of course connection to other single women at different stages of their SMC journey. 

If you want a more private interaction with me, then consider indvidual coaching. You get up to 2 calls per month with me, voicemail and text access as well as access to all my content and done for your research.

Quotes

"I've heard more recently the word 'solo mom' and I feel like that almost more accurately describes this. I didn’t set out to be a single mom, most people don't, I don't think. It's just the circumstances." -- Brooke

"It's hard to be responsible for everything I guess in general but, I mean all the finances, it all weighs on single moms." -- Brooke

"Let people help you. Accept the help and ask for help. People want to help, just like you want to help. I want to help, when somebody needs something, I'm happy to help. Other people do too." -- Brooke